Patience

I've been a musician much longer than I've been a Christian. I was in multiple bands as a young man and most of the bands I played in wrote original music. I've always enjoyed that creative process of making music.

After I came to Christ, writing music was difficult. It wasn't the creating of the rhythms or melodies, but the lyrics. What should I sing to God? Would anything I want to say even carry merit? 

After I took my first ministry job in Las Vegas as a youth pastor, I was so green in my role as full-time minister that I felt like I was making mistake after mistake. I have the first clue on how to create a schedule, manage my time well, counsel students (or adults!), or build teams. I felt like the only thing I knew how to do was sing and play my guitar and I knew I needed to grow in tons of other areas to really be the leader I was called to be. 

This angst inspired the first song I wrote as a believer. The lyrics to the first verse and chorus go like this:

(vs 1) Every time I try to do it myself, You let me know that I don't have to

Every time I try to be someone else, You show my just who I am

(ch) And I want to thank You, Lord

For the patience that You have shown

'Cause I know if I was in control

My patience would have run out long ago

This song was inspired from how Jesus made me feel when I drew near to Him and allowed His mercy to wash over me in a season when I felt humbled and inadequate constantly. When I felt I failed on any level, Jesus would whisper, "I still love you... Try again." 

He still whispers into my tired heart today. I still feel failure at times. I still feel inadequate too. The difference is I know my standing with Jesus never changes.

2 Peter 3:9 (ESV)
"The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance."

The songs we will be singing in our worship set this weekend are:

How Great Thou Art
What A Beautiful Name
Hosanna